The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage Are Creating a Generation of Disconnected and Unhappy Kids
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List Price: $13.95
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Manufacturer: Harper Paperbacks
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Average Customer Rating:  
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Binding: Paperback
Dewey Decimal Number: 649
EAN: 9780060595852
ISBN: 006059585X
Label: Harper Paperbacks
Manufacturer: Harper Paperbacks
Number Of Items: 1
Number Of Pages: 256
Publication Date: 2008-04-22
Publisher: Harper Paperbacks
Release Date: 2008-07-29
Studio: Harper Paperbacks
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Editorial Reviews:
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In recent years, numerous studies have shown that bright, charming, seemingly confident and socially skilled teenagers from affluent, loving families are experiencing epidemic rates of depression, substance abuse, and anxiety disordersârates higher than in any other socioeconomic group of American adolescents. Materialism, pressure to achieve, perfectionism, and disconnection are combining to create a perfect storm that is devastating children of privilege and their parents alike. In this eye-opening, provocative, and essential book, clinical psychologist Madeline Levine explodes one child-rearing myth after another. With empathy and candor, she identifies toxic cultural influences and well-intentioned, but misguided, parenting practices that are detrimental to a child's healthy self-development. Her thoughtful, practical advice provides solutions that will enable parents to help their emotionally troubled "star" child cultivate an authentic sense of self.
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Spotlight customer reviews:
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Customer Rating:
Summary: Teens are fine; grownups (and psychologists) are messed up
Comment: If author Levine reversed her book's title and emphasis to warn about the epidemic of parents inflicting their own materialism, drug and alcohol abuse, crime, divorce, and other ills on their teenaged kids, this would be valuable book. Just look at the misguided, favorable reviews to see how badly this book miscommunicates the realities facing teens today.
I taught at a big university near Marin County and saw hundreds of these "priveleged" (and not so privileged) students at close range. As a generation, they're fine, generally coping well with stresses. Their parents' generation, however, is not all right. I'm convinced from the growing stack of books like these that psychologists desperately need to get out of their offices and spend time in homes and real-life environments to see how a variety of young people (not just the tiny fraction they see as clients) are coping.
Or, at least, psychologists should stop citing anecdotes and self-praising cases and study the social statistics for the areas they live in. Let us take public health and crime figures for Marin County and compare adults ages 40-49 (the average parents) with teens. About 10 times more parents than teens die from drug abuse, 50% more 40-agers are arrested (including nearly TWICE as many for felonies) than teenagers, FIVE TIMES more 40-aged parents than teenaged youths are arrested for drug and alcohol related offenses, and seven times more parents than teens commit suicide. Those are just a few indicators among many to suggest that it isn't the teens--it's the grownups of Levine's generation who are messed up. You can explore more of these shocking statistics for yourselves. For example, see California tabulations at:
http://stats.doj.ca.gov/cjsc_stats/prof06/21/18.htm (crime)
http://www.applications.dhs.ca.gov/vsq/screen1a.asp?Year_Data=2006&Stats=1 (health)
Levine's claims that teenagers today are more materialistic, selfish, money-hungry, etc. are just garbage. The same surveys she cites actually show that as a result of their parents' generation's greedy refusal to pay taxes to support schools, teens and college students today face massive debts and must work more in college to pay skyrocketing tuitions than their more generously supported parents did 40 years ago. By the best measures, students today are much more community oriented, happier, and less materialistic and troubled than their parents were or are.
So, my modest suggestion is that if you mistakenly bought this book, rip out 90% of the pages and keep only the few in which Levine urges parents to cut out their own bad behaviors and values. Reviewers: stop buying into these books, even if they do flatter your personal demographic. Publishers: we've got a big enough stack of psychologists' narrow, bubble-world misconceptions derived from fixating on their most troubled clients and failure to engage the realities of the larger world.
Mike Males, Ph.D.
http://www.YouthFacts.org
Customer Rating:
Summary: Excellent read
Comment: I read this for a parent's book club. I breezed through it and found it really useful. Great examples, really brought the book to life. I gained some very good insights and tips from it. And the book club had a long, involved discussion. The book was a perfect launching point.
Customer Rating:
Summary: Loved it!!!
Comment: This book was chosen at our high school for a book discussion. Dr. Levine really knows what she is talking about. This book was interesting all the way through and very insightful. It helps me to understand my adolesents and the adolescents I work with better. Hopefully, I have become a better mother because of this book. I strongly recommend this book to anyone who is a parent or who works with kids. There were certainly issues that came up that are also common in the middle class, it is not only about rich kids.
Customer Rating:
Summary: Money Doesn't Always Buy Happiness...
Comment: I'll jump right in and say it -- my husband and I may very well be at the lower end of the target demographic for this book. We both work full time, we live in a relatively affluent area of Northern California, own a home, have a Prius, and are currently contemplating whether to send our kids to public or private school. Nevertheless, I was pretty skeptical about a book that treats upper class kids as an "at risk" group, similar to kids who come from poverty-level backgrounds. Yes, the stories and anecdotes sprinkled throughout the book made me feel sad for these kids and families who seem so detached from themselves and each other. But how can you argue that these poor little rich boys and girls deserve just as much pity and focus as kids who literally have nothing but the shirt on their backs?
The truth is a bit more complicated. Like it or not, children who come from more affluent backgrounds are still more likely to rise to a prominent position in our society -- whether that be political, educational, or social -- than kids from a lower socioeconomic background. These are incredibly influential roles that play a huge part in determining the future of our country and our world. So we should be concerned when we hear about the rising number of affluent kids who leave the nest with zero sense of self or personal accountability, drug and alcohol problems, damaged moral compasses, and a general lack of compassion for his/her fellow humans. Whether you "feel sorry" for these children or not is beside the point...the problem is real and these kids can and frequently do grow into adults who have a lot of clout but little interest in leaving this planet a better place than when they arrived.
Levine's book clearly illustrates the challenges these kids face and the repercussions their damaged lifestyles have - not just on themselves but on families, friends, and an ever widening circle of individuals as the kids grow into adults. But lest you think this is one of those downer books that spends hundreds of pages telling you what's wrong without providing a solution, Levine also points out some potential steps parents and communities can take to provide affluent (and indeed ALL) kids with opportunities to become and stay well-rounded, contributing individuals.
Customer Rating:
Summary: Lots of interesting information
Comment: The book was filled with interesting insight into how affluent kids are being raised. I appreciated the referenced facts and statistics, and the breakdown of what kids are going through by age. It definitely caused me to re-think the reward-based motivation that I have been using with my children, and re-focusing more on the joy of the activity for it's own sake. I also thought the last chapter for mom's was thought provoking - mom's usually don't have the time to think about ourselves. The book definitely lags in places, and there are a lot of chapters that are obvious and/or redundant.
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